Thursday, May 16, 2013

A working mother's best and worst day

Here is a brief glimpse at the last really good day that I had as a working mom... and it involved utilizing a paid personal business day, so I didn't have to go to work at all! (Working does have some perks!) First of all, we all slept in until the kids naturally woke up on their own and we leisurely got out of bed. Next we had breakfast, and I got my oldest ready for school and dropped her off at elementary school. I took my other 2 in for their doctor's appointments. Afterwards, my toddler was asking me if she could go to "school" because she wanted to play with her friends and told me that she "loves school". When I dropped them off at day care, my little one wanted to hold my hand and have me sit in circle time with her. She was so excited to bring me into her classroom and get to experience her world. She was beaming! The baby was all smiles. After spending a good hour with the kids in their classrooms, I left and went to go get my hair cut... not at the usual super cuts... but at an expensive salon! Woah! I do this once or twice a year. So great! Afterwards I got AN HOUR MASSAGE. AWESOME! Relaxing time for myself! Afterwards, met a girlfriend for a drink! All the time getting paid, and not feeling guilty for doing all this. After a few hours, I picked up my kids and we had a great evening. We went for a walk, we read books. The whole while thinking, I could really never ever have a day like this if I wasn't working...

Now, contrast this to a really bad day... thankfully they are not like this everyday, but they do come around once in a while... First of all, the alarm gets set wrong, or for some reason I hit the snooze button too many times.. I'm off to a late start. I fell asleep before taking out the laundry the night before, so I don't have clothes to wear. You end up wearing, you know, the really bad clothes, that you are embarrassed to wear into the office, but it's all you've got, and you know you look dumpy, but it's the best you can do. The baby starts screaming before you even leave your room. She's not co-operating. You manage to squeeze her into clothes during the screaming-bucking episode, and by this time the other children are already fighting over the toothpaste and toothbrushes, and at this time I realize I am 7 minutes from missing my daughters bus ride to school. I have an 8:30 meeting with my boss, that I am going to have to text her and tell her I am running late. (Does everyone hate that feeling as much as I do?) and after screaming and possibly spanking, losing my temper several times, and cussing a few more, manage to get everyone dressed (barely) and downstairs. The baby poops and I have to change her again. She is doing the bucking thing again and I have to hold her legs down with all my might to get her diaper changed and pants back on. She's screaming at the top of her lungs. Now my toddler is throwing a crying fit because we didn't put the right kind of headband on. I can't get her to stop. I forgot to wash my pump parts the night before, so everything is smelling like rancid milk. I'm trying to wash everything as best I can, throw lunches together, prepare the bottles, get the crib sheets and blankets together for the cots at daycare, and everything else I need for the day. By this time, the two youngest are crying and the oldest is whining that her stomach hurts. Now not only did we miss the bus, but we are actually late for school. Now I just added 20 more minutes of late to my day because I have to escort my daughter to the front desk and sign her in with a reason for her tardiness. Lovely. Getting the other two off to daycare, with at least 2 kids crying on the way. The baby has taken off her socks and her shoes... we had to pick up McGriddles from McDonald's drive thru because I had no time to feed them breakfast at home. At day care I have to park in the far spot because all the close ones are taken. Try doing that with 3 kids and crib sheets and lunches and backpacks and kids with no shoes on - no small feat. Driving to work - grateful for the solitude. During lunch, getting a call from school because my daughter said something disrespectful to a teacher. Great... thinking, look, I know how you feel, she does the same thing to me at home. At work getting an invitation to an important meeting that had to be scheduled from 4 to 5 to accommodate some managers schedule. Having to decline the meeting because, hey, day care closes at 6 and I have to pick up my kids. (Does anyone else hate THAT feeling also??) The little voice in the back of your head that reminds you that you are such a less than stellar employee.. and not only you, but everyone around you knows it... but that doesn't cut as nearly as bad as the thought that you are a less than stellar mother! Your kids getting to see you scream at them walking out the door, and scream at them coming home while trying to get them into bed. Walking in the door at 6:30, to a pig sty of a house and a stressed out husband because he has job stress and a bad back and a bad knee and chronic pain and hasn't gotten laid in over a month and can't stand to hear the baby screaming at the top of her lungs, which she does everyday at all times, because her mom has eco-breastfed her into a tyrannical crying spoiled little thing that needs constant holding and constant attention. The getting-to-bed war is as bad as the going-to-school war. Wash, Rinse, and Repeat. Some days I think, it's just gotta be better than this... like I said, not everyday is this bad, (thank God!) but some days ARE really this bad.  :-)

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